| Date: | December 9, 1975 |
| Location: | Albany, NY |
| Category: | Happy |
| Tags: | Keiley Shearer |
Misheard Lyrics Create Jealousy in 4 Year Old
For the first 4 1/2 years of my life I thought I was the King of my Parents World. All the attention was showered upon my every move and comment. I could do know wrong. Then... all of a sudden, a week before Christmas I got a surprise. No it wasn't Santa dropping off my Rock 'em, Sock 'em Robots early... it was a brand new baby sister.
What the... And just like that I was no longer the best act in town. I had competition... and it was fierce. Every chance I got to take her out- I took it. I would bite my own hand and blame it on her, break my own toys, whatever it took to get her 'fired' from the family.
It was also at that time that Paul Simon came out with a catchy little ditty by the name of "50 Ways To Leave Your Lover." I loved that song as much as a four-year-old virgin could. Singing, dancing... whatever. But...on one such occasion, as I sang at the top of my lungs, I realized that the song was tainted. There, hidden in the lyrics, was my sister's name.
Hop on the bus, Gus
You don't need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, Lee
And get yourself free
No, her name is not Gus. (Although that would've been awesome) It is, however, Keiley and if you say it deliberate enough, it sounds like Key Lee.
I remember being so upset and confused as to why she got a song with her name in it and I got nothing. It took some explaining and several years for me to come to grips with Paul Simon's slight. Still to this day, whenever the song comes on (and yes, I still sing it out loud), I sing that line with my sister's name. Sorry, Lee.